Can we all just slow down a second....

where is the time going? how is it possible that cohen will be 14 weeks old on saturday and connor is going to be five and driving and married before i can catch my breath? please, can't we all just take things a little bit slower now before i get dizzy???

a few things i wanted to note tonight about sweet cohen: he's just got to be the best baby around right now. he is a great sleeper and eater. loves to smile at his brother. or mother. or anybody. he has the cutest patch of little hair on his back just above one of the cutest bottoms i know i've ever seen. he also has cute hair growing off the sides of his cute little ears. and his ears ARE little. so are his feet. but his legs are plump. plumpy is what we like to call him. and he is just the sweetest, mild-mannered, even-tempered baby. what a precious boy. what a miracle. i changed his diaper and laid him down tonight at 9pm. he didn't even squeak. just drifted off to dream a little before waking up to be fed again around 10:45pm. now he should sleep for several hours (fingers crossed on that hope.) but who can lay a 3 month old baby down...just lay him on down in his bed and wrap him in his little blankey...and he doesn't do anything but smile at you and close his eyes? he's amazing. just amazing.

and his brother...wow. also very amazing, amazing, amazing. we were at cpo today picking out birthday cards for his daddy. he wanted to go look at all the veggie tales stuff. i just stood back and watched him. he just looked and looked. he picked up this puzzle, or that book. or he would stand with his hands clasped in front of him while he took it all in. he never asked me for one thing. he really, truly enjoyed just looking. and i really, truly stopped for those few moments and enjoyed just looking at him. he was beautiful to watch with his blonde hair and his sweet face. i could have cried tears of pride over standing in the bookstore watching my son. i want to hang on to that mental picture of him forever. when i went upstairs to nurse cohen just a little while ago, i went in to kiss connor in his bed. he was sound asleep under 2 giant stuffed dogs (oscar and booge), a fish named rachel, larry the cucumber, boo boo bear and of course, brown dog and bear-bear. i had to literally dig him out just to kiss his face! it was wonderful. he is so wonderful.

tomorrow lane will be 38 years old. connor, cohen and i all have cards for him to open, and then we have a special day of things planned for him on saturday. i'm so thankful the Lord made him and gave him to me. i can really see how he consciously makes an effort everyday to be the very best daddy or husband he knows how to be. it is something to watch your husband love his children to pieces. and it is amazing how he loves me. or that he loves me! somedays, you know, i'm not the easiest nut to crack. happy birthday, my beloved. you are adored more than you will ever know by the 3 others to whom you gave your name. and 2 of them also got your DNA. lucky fellas.

Random Thoughts...

Nutella is my newfound food love. How have I lived 35 years without this wonderfully chocolatey heavenly hazelnuty spread??? I now put it on everything! Bread, english muffins, wrapped in those little cresent rolls you bake in the oven (that is my favorite.) It's also good on english muffins w/ a little freshly sliced strawberries (or strawberry preserves, if fresh ones aren't readily available.) I am actually getting ready to visit the Nutella website for other delicious ideas.

Also, it has dawned on me recently that living with 3 men is going to be a big, stinky, dirty, glorious mess.

Precious Connor

Lane tucked Cohen into bed tonight while I gave Connor his bath and put him to bed. We said our prayers and he asked me to sing 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' because he really dislikes that song and I think this is his way of trying to overcome his dislike for it. Anyway, after we prayed and sang, he wanted to ask questions. He always wants to ask questions as a way of prolonging inevitable sleep, but we still let him ask because it's always something profound or sweet or thoughtful that he comes up with. Tonight he wanted to know if we get new bodies when we go to Heaven, which we have talked about before, so I told him 'yes.' But I also told him that God gave us bodies that He made special just for us to use while we're here. He thought that was pretty cool, and then he wanted to pray and ask God something. So here's how that went:

'Thank you, Lord, for this day and that my baby brother got to come. And draw me close to you, Lord, and can I bring all my stuffed animals up there to Heaven? Amen.'

He's so awesome, that boy.

Sunday Night in Paragould...

lane drove back to nixa tonight because he has to work in the morning and i wanted to spend a couple extra days in paragould with the boys since connor is on spring break this week. it hurt my heart to watch him pull out of the driveway and head home by himself. i know he'll be just fine and will probably enjoy a little quietness around the house when he's home for a couple of days, but we'll miss him terribly. he is such a wonderful dad and he and connor have really gotten close. as a matter of fact, when i told connor why daddy was loading the car tonight before he left, he cried and cried. i think his daddy is his very best friend. isn't that wonderful?

i put the boys to bed together tonight. the three of us sat in bed and read 4 books, then we tucked cohen into his miracle blanket (which lives up to its name entirely). then connor and i knelt by the side of the bed and said our prayers before hopping into bed for me to sing to him and tell him a story. he informed me that 'daddy tells really good stories.' guess i need to brush up on my story-telling skills.

when i read back over the stuff i am typing it sounds pretty boring to someone who isn't me or my kids or husband, but i just think someday later on when this day is long gone i will be really glad i recorded some of these mundane thoughts and happenings because they will become special little memories. that's my disclaimer. nighty-night.

Adventures in Arkansas (Cohen's 1st visit to Paragould out of the belly)

lane, connor, cohen and i drove to p'gould friday night. it was a fantastic trip considering we had a 4 yr old and a 9 wk old in the backseat...no crying or movie-watching for 3 1/2 hours. it was miraculous. when we arrived at gran & paw paw's house they had dairy queen waiting for connor (plain cheeseburger, ff's & chocolate milk-per his request), and catfish & bbq per our request. what a heavenly meal! i'm never gonna get this pregnancy weight off.

this morning, after what's become a staple meal of french toast for connor fixed by his paw paw, lane took him to see isaac cook's soccer game. then they went out to the cook's farm so connor could play with eli & isaac. lane took lots of pictures-which i plan to post on here just as soon as i figure out how. connor rode on isaac's horse 'duke' and went fishin'...then had dairy queen again for lunch. what a dream afternoon for a little boy. after a nap and some family photo-taking outside in the yard with paw paw's awesome new camera, we took connor down to the high school football field. he loved being able to just run, run, run and 'play' football with his daddy. i loved being able to take more pictures of it all with paw paw's awesome new camera. did i mention that his camera is awesome?! it is so awesome.

cohen spent his day taking naps, getting his diaper changed, drinking lots of milk, and being passed around to all kinds of people who came to love on him...ie: nonny carolyn, susan havens, mary rankin, memmaw, aunt shay & uncle bub. that boy is a gem. i don't want to rush the growing up process, but i am really excited to see him and his older brother grow up together.

well, our dog-and-pony show is in town until wednesday of this week so i'm sure i'll have plenty more to add to this adventure story. it's too late at night for me to conjour up any creative-writing skills. my eyes are crossing.

it's bedtime at the mcmurry homestead. everyone's asleep except me and that's just because i wanted to give a quick account of last night and today's happenings that made me smile, laugh, and stop and stare in awe at my boys.

last night on the way home from chili's after dinner, connor said he needed a haircut. said he wanted all his hairs to look like daddy's. not gonna happen anytime soon as far as i'm concerned, but when he's 34 or so and in charge of his own hairs he can cut 'em however he wants...all of them hairs.

cohen had his 2 month check-up this morning. he weighed 13.6 lbs and was 23 inches long. he was in the 50thish percentile for height and the 80thish percentile for weight...short and squishy, but oh so adorable! he got a 2 thumbs up from dr. fusco and 3 shots in his chubby little thighs from a very nice nurse who felt very badly for making my baby (and his mama) cry. thank the Good Lord Lane was able to get away from work to come hold him for me while he got poked in the legs. i kept telling myself it was for his own good but it'd be fine with me if he never had to cry like that again.

while we were at dr. fusco's, we asked her about connor's hyper-sensitivity to sudden loud noises (he just breaks into tears at the sound of a loud buzzer at a basketball game or the train's whistle at silver dollar city-and he LOVES trains!). she said he must just be more sensitive than others and he would most likely grow out of it...she suggested i carry some soft ear plugs for him to use whenever he might need them. something occurred to me there in that office. connor prayed for God to give him a baby brother and God not only answered his prayer but also included a special blessing in that cohen does not cry often, or loudly when he does cry. how amazing it is that God sent this precious little baby to us and blessed our socks off! right down to the little soft and infrequent crys. connor will have to be told this someday so that's why i'm writing about it now. i want him to know how much God loves him. and i want him to know that when he asks God for something and it's in the plans, God will blow him away with the goodness and perfectness of His answer. since the time cohen was born, i was only seeing his good-babyness from my perspective...it never occurred to me until today that God was also blessing connor in a very specific little way by creating cohen to be such a good baby. wow.

i recorded both of their little voices tonight on my iphone. i never, ever want to forget what they sound like. and i never, ever want to forget how much God loves my little boys. and me. despite myself. wow. He's so good. Good Night.

Been awhile...

i probably don't have much time to spend typing today...both connor & cohen are sleeping and that can't last any too long! so this is the first time i have mentioned cohen. he just came into our lives on january 16th and we didn't know his name until january 18th. he is incredible. just the most laid back little guy-a great sleeper (which is never to be taken for granted!), a great eater, and he possesses one of the most beautiful smiles i have ever laid eyes on. his big brother is crazy about him and cares about him deeply. very deeply, considering he's 4 years old and brand-new to the concept that his mama & daddy now love another human being as much as they love him. that, in itself, is a miracle i could never comprehend until it happened to me. i would look at connor often while i was pregnant with cohen and wonder how in the world i would ever be able to love someone as much as i love connor. it is something only God can make possible. and the fact that it occurred as instantly as the moment i first saw cohen's face speaks to the awesomeness of my Heavenly Father. the fact that He gave me not just one, but two of the most perfectly adorable and precious human beings ever created makes me want to cry and laugh and jump up and down all at the same time. He knows i'm so undeserving of such great gifts and love. man, i'm so thankful.

so they both sleep. and there isn't time enough in the world or words perfect enough to capture my love and gratefulness for these two little boys. i look forward to writing more about them and the amazing things they do.